Going Bananas Over Bananas

We spent the whole day baking. And we made cupcakes (AGAIN!) due to popular demand by a little young man. We made crackers again. And we experimented in making banana crackers. The sides were crispy, but the texture of the middle parts were like roti canai. I am not complaining, but it would have been nice if all of them turned out crispy. But the little young man enjoyed them. We also attempted banana chips. But they did not turn out crispy. They turned out chewy instead.

Here is the recipe for the banana crackers.

Ingredients:

1. 1 1/2 cup flour (1/2 cup of all-purpose flour, high protein bread flour and whole-meal flour)
2. 1/2 teaspoon sea salt
3. 3 tablespoons of butter
4. About 6 tablespoons of cold water
5. 2 large bananas

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1. Preheat oven to 200C.

2. Sieve the flour and salt into a large bowl.

3. Add the butter into the bowl and mix the ingredients until it resembles bread crumbs.

4. Mash the bananas and add it into the mixture.

5. Add the cold water and mix the dough until the mixture forms a compact ball. If it is crumbly, add more water. If it is too sticky, add more flour.

6. Divide the dough into 4 to 6 round balls.

7. Put a ball of dough onto a baking sheet and roll it until it is evenly flat. The thinner it is, the crispier the crackers will be.

8. You can use a pizza cutter to pre-cut the crackers before putting them into the oven. I used a butter knife. Use a fork to poke holes into the flattened dough.

9. Bake for about 20 to 25 minutes or until it is brown.

10. Once it is cool, break the crackers into pieces.

Recipe for banana chips.

1. Preheat oven to 90C. Coat baking tray/foil with a thin layer of butter.

2. Slice bananas thinly (about 1/8") and place on baking tray.

3. Bake for about 2 hours + or until brown and crispy.

Banana cupcakes with sprinkles (by the little young man)

Wholemeal crackers

The Glorious Heavens (Part 6)

A jet flying in the far distance

'We all live under the same sky, but we don't all have the same horizon.' - Konrad Adenauer

'The sky is that beautiful old parchment in which the sun and the moon keep their diary.' - Alfred Kreymborg

Cupcakes, Cupcakes and MORE Cupcakes! And Crackers Too!

My little young man got back his appetite all of a sudden after indulging in my home-made banana cupcakes. He has been talking non-stop about cupcakes, eating cupcakes for breakfast, morning tea, afternoon tea and supper, breathing cupcakes and most likely dreaming about cupcakes at this very moment!

I baked a smaller batch yesterday and Joel finished everything by this morning's breakfast! I made banana cupcakes yesterday. It is salicylate-free if you do not add the sprinkles on the top. Here is the recipe for the banana cupcake.

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Ingredients:

1. 3 tablespoons of butter
2. 2 tablespoons of refined brown sugar
3. 2 large eggs
4. 3 large bananas
5. 1 1/2 cups of self-raising flour
6. Sprinkles (optional)

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1. Cream the butter and sugar in a large bowl.

2. Add in one egg at a time and beat it well.

3. Mash the bananas and add them into the creamed mixture.

4. Beat them well.

5. Add the sifted flour a bit at a time and continue to beat it well.

6. Fill the paper cupcakes with the batter.

7. You can add some sprinkles on top if desired.

8. Bake them in pre-heated oven of 190C. Bake for about 20 minutes or until slightly browned.

Enjoy your cupcakes!

The plain cupcakes are salicylate-free

The little young man made these today. He prepared all the paper cups, mixed the ingredients, beat the ingredients well and did the sprinkling. All I did was to scoop the batter into the cups and put them into the oven to bake and to take them out. He even helped a lot in the 'eating part'!

We made lemon and banana cupcakes today. If you are able to tolerate lemons (I cannot tolerate them at all), you can replace the bananas with the rind of 1 lemon and juice of 1 lemon.

Cupcakes galore! Lemon cupcakes (in front container) and banana cupcakes (in container next to casserole).

I managed to bake wholemeal crackers yesterday. I used a bit less butter than the original saltine crackers recipe. I find that it has its own unique taste. And I have to stop pigging out on crackers and work more in the garden. If not, I'll be looking like cupcakes SOON!

Just replace the all-purpose flour with wholemeal flour and you're all set to bake wholemeal crackers!

Here's the link to my salicylate-free salt crackers:

Salicylate-Free Salt Crackers Recipe



Bon Appetit!

The Container Garden - An Update

My one-year-old lemon tree has been very out of shape. I trimmed it and it looks VERY neat now!

My 1 year-old lemon tree!

Some of the cherry tomatoes

The lone sweet corn!

I sowed six corn seeds but only two sprouted. And one of them died after sprouting. The weather was just too wet. Only this survived. I hope it is sweet.

A new pot of Periwinkle!

The ONLY red spinach! The rest of the seedlings died from the constant downpour.

Not very healthy looking vegetables due to the excessive downpour everyday.

The baby radish! 

All 5 baby radishes. They were VERY tiny.

3rd harvest of kangkung

The periwinkle seeds fell into the bougainvillea pot, sprouted and now is blooming very well!

They come in droves everyday! Haha... Escargot?

I had to harvest them while they were still green as fruit flies were all over the place! I placed them in a container and let them ripen at room temperature. 

More are turning yellow

The ripened tomatoes!

The cherry tomatoes were attacked by the sparrows!

More tomatoes and a mini capsicum!

The Oleander Hawk Caterpillars are back! 

A Swallowtail butterfly laying an egg on my baby orange tree

This is a WEED, but it has beautiful, tiny yellow flowers. Does anybody know its name?

Allamanda flowers in full bloom (buttercups)

White Japanese Rose

One of the last harvest

I've chopped down all the okra, tomatoes, capsicums and chilli plants as they have all caught viral diseases and fungus infections due to the excessive rain every day. I added compost to all the soils and am PATIENTLY waiting for the rainy weather to be over. Hopefully next year will be a greater year where the vegetable harvest is concerned! :)

Salicylate-Free Salt Crackers

I have not eaten crackers in 32 months now since the anaphylaxis attack in March 2009. So when the first tray came out from the oven, they all disappeared into my stomach within 2 minutes! It was heaven!

Here is the recipe for salicylate-free salt crackers:

1 1/4 cup of all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon of salt
3 tablespoons of butter
About 6 tablespoons of cold water
(If you can tolerate low doses of salicylate, you can add sesame seeds to the recipe) You can add nuts, poppy seeds, herbs if you are able to tolerate them.

1. Preheat oven to 200C.

2. Sieve the flour and salt into a large bowl.

3. Add the butter into the bowl and mix the ingredients until it resembles bread crumbs.

4. Add the cold water and mix the dough until the mixture forms a compact ball. If it is crumbly, add more water. If it is too sticky, add more flour.

5. Divide the dough into 4 to 6 round balls.

6. Put a ball of dough onto a baking sheet and roll it until it is evenly flat. The thinner it is, the crispier the crackers will be.

7. You can use a pizza cutter to pre-cut the crackers before putting them into the oven. I used a butter knife. Use a fork to poke holes into the flattened dough.

8. If you want to add seeds or nuts to the crackers, you can do so. Press the seeds/nuts into the dough so that they will stay on the crackers.

9. Bake for about 15 to 20 minutes or until it is brown.

10. Once it is cool, break the crackers into pieces.

Bon appetit!

Before baking (with white sesame seeds)

Before baking (with black sesame seeds)

After baking (plain salt crackers)

Crackers all ready to be devoured!

Woman Vs. Beast

I do not know why every year end is an exceptionally difficult time. Something major always seem to happen. And then long bouts of depression. Last year was a relapse. And this year, it was a severe viral bug which somehow contributed to an-almost-anaphylactic-attack which triggered severe exhaustion in my body, soul and mind. Yes, I am a woman who battles with the Idiopathic Anaphylaxis beast everyday.

I am still hanging on to that edge of the cliff. I am trying not to look down into the ravine and am focusing on hauling myself up to safety. At least I am still hanging on and not dead in that ravine. But the exhaustion is terrifying. One day at a time is usually the motto of other people. My mantra or motto is one minute at a time. And that is how this woman faces her beast everyday.

Wile E Coyote & the Road Runner

For those of you who grew up watching Warner Bros cartoons, you would be familiar with Wile E Coyote and the Road Runner. My brother and I used to laugh till we cried at the stupidity of The Coyote and marveled at how 'smart' the Road Runner was.

Idiopathic Anaphylaxis (IA) can be seen as The Coyote. And we are the Road Runner. No one can answer to why The Coyote chose to destroy the Road Runner over and over again even though he fails EVERY SINGLE TIME! Neither can anyone answer to why Idiopathic Anaphylaxis 'attacks' certain people over and over again and not others.

But one thing that we can learn from the cartoon is that the Road Runner ALWAYS outruns, beats up The Coyote and wins. Why? Because the Road Runner is smart.

So I am going to continue on being 'smart' and will TNT this Idiopathic Anaphylaxis and cause it to careen and fall off the cliff. How? Let me tell you how.

1. Pull Back

In difficult and depressing times, people suffocate me. I need solitude and silence to get out from the pits of depression. This works for me. You need to find what works for you.

2. Hide in Your Cave


My house is my safe haven. Others see me as a prisoner of my own home. But I am safe in here. And I am glad that I still have a place that is 'safe'. And I will stay home and hide until I am better and stronger. Find YOUR safe haven.

3. Go Back to Basics

Diet will be 100% salicylate free for the time being. And I will make sure I do not expose myself to any chemicals for the time being until I am stronger.

4. Stop Condemning Yourself

Of course as a mother and as a person, I wish I could just drop everything and just leave for holidays on the spot. I wish I do not need to plan everything (including trips to malls or every single outing) in such detailed manner. My meticulous planning will even put the White House Secret Service to shame. But it is a necessity to do this, in order for me to stay alive and well. And I will TRY to stop condemning myself!

5. Learn to Accept that Regress is in Fact Progress

I have gone backwards in my journey in attempting to regain my health and life back. What does not break me, makes me stronger. Going through this will make me even stronger.

6. You Have to Just Keep on Pushing

You just have to keep on going no matter what happens. Even when depression strikes. Even when the only door that seems to be open is the 'Give Up Door'.

7. Sleep and Eat All That You Can

Since chemical-free food and sleep are my weapons in fighting Idiopathic Anaphylaxis, I shall sleep and eat all I can. Yes, even if it means 12-straight-hours-of-sleep for days or weeks or months.

8. Find An Outlet

Writing, music, gardening (envisioning IA in the soil and me digging furiously to 'kill' it) de-stresses me. Find something that you can channel your frustrations into.

9. Stress Factor

Stress is a major factor in reducing our body's natural immunity. And a stressed-out system is an open door for IA to act up. And I am still learning at how to 'control' my stress level. I am thinking of yoga.

10. Join A Support Group

I am very, very glad that I found a support group who speaks in the same language that I do. The moderator, Candace Van Auken is an amazing lady who has helped a lot in sharing with me information and in encouraging me. The members there are wonderful too. All of you wonderful ladies have been amazing. I am learning something new everyday. I tried looking for people like me in Malaysia. It was like looking for a needle in a haystack. This group has been a blessing and I am extremely grateful and blessed to have found them. I dedicate this post to all of you strong, women of steel. Thank you.


I would like to thank all of you who have been encouraging me via e-mails, SMS-es and comments on my blog. I am truly grateful for your words. And to all you silent readers, thank you!

P.s.: I would love to downsize IA to the size of that coyote and squash it under my feet once and for all! ;)

The Girl In A Mask

Life for me has taken on a peculiar turn. I have recovered from the horrible flu bug. As usual, after a bout of flu or cold, I will end up with a loss sense of smell for a period of time (which usually lasts a couple of weeks). In the meantime, while the sense of smell is slowly returning, I have become super-duper-hyperly-extremely-sensitive to smells. And the best part is, I can't smell them at this point of time! But the smells and scents trigger reactions. And I have deteriorated where smells and scents are concerned. 

This incident happened last week. After buying Joel's books and uniform, we both went to a mall for lunch. Of course, my lunch is in my own in a Thermos flask. I did not know that they had incense wafting through the restaurant as I did not smell it. It was only later that I remembered that there was an altar in that restaurant. But we were already there for a period of time. And then we left and went to look for back-to-school stuff. And there was another shop which was undergoing major renovation. And even with my none-smelling-nose, I could smell it. And boy, could I smell the paint, lacquer, spirit and CHEMICALS! I ran from that place. And then we went to the supermarket. And they had just finished a MAJOR renovation. And that place stank to the high heavens! By the time I got home, I had a migraine from Hades, my sinus, mouth and tongue burned with such intensity that I thought my face was going to drop off and my stomach was in chaos. And then I had a new reaction which I had never had before. The insides and the back of my ears swelled so much that half of my hearing was gone. I had thought that it would escalate into another anaphylactic attack. And the pain was so severe. I swallowed a Zrytec and Xyzal together to stop the attack. And thank god, it did. And I am glad it did not end in an anaphylactic attack. 

Before I had the severe flu, I could 'tolerate' smells. But this reaction, which happened last week caught me by surprise. It was so severe. And it scared the hell out of me. And my fighting spirit has been hit. I feel depressed and down in the dumps. And the scary part is, I don't know whether I can go through another attack and come out unscathed.

One Thousand And One

Tormented
Those one thousand and one thoughts,
Screaming in my head

Shattered
All those dreams of mine,
They are all in one thousand and one pieces, shredded

Trapped
Under one thousand and one burdens
That my strength might suddenly snap

Suffocated
Even with one thousand and one breath
My lungs still feel constipated

Sucked into this vortex
I will claw my way out
Out of this icy complex
Which is shrouded by a dark, big cloud

This battle will be intense
I will raise up the defense
And bring on the offense
And smell the sweet smell of the victory incense

It Ain't Over 'Till It's Over

Mildew forming on my lips
Rendering me utterly useless
How I miss those little skips
During the time where I had no losses

One by one we all fall down
Step by step we tumble over
Gone are the days, away they've flown
When I was in a state more than sober

Cold is the wind that blows
Stagnant is the life that supposedly flows
When oh when, will this battle be over
Or will this be rampant, with me always running for cover

Do I give up?
Do I give in?
'Cos when Death comes again and says, 'Your time's up!'
Do I look at It in the eyes and kick it in the shin
And say,
'It ain't over, 'till it's over.'

And So It Goes

Life passes me by
In a blink of an eye
Tears that turn to joy
Laughter that ends in pain

Though I've fallen
Down and down and down
Does not mean
That I have fallen
And never to get up again

Surrounded by ravens
Weighed down by the shackles
When the rays of the sun
Blinded my foes to oblivion

Sometimes we wake up
Sometimes we don't
Sometimes when we fall
That fall kills us
And so it goes
That when I fall again,
I will fly.