Tuesday 24 January 2012

Life = Driving in KV (Part 2 - The Top 10 Drivers That You Meet On The Road)

The reason I titled it 'The Drivers That You Meet On The Road' is because there are drivers that you WILL meet on the curb, on the sidewalk, on the lawn, on car roofs and even in buildings. It is truly 'amazing' how the drivers of today drive their vehicles. One would have thought that as civilization advance, people would be more 'intelligent'. Possess more common sense. Sadly, that's not the case. In fact, common sense is becoming harder to find these days.

So here are the top 10 drivers that you meet on the road.

1. The Road Bully
This person is basically a coward. This driver needs to bully in order to feel powerful and strong. He thinks he is omnipotent. Sad to say, these type of drivers are pathetic. I am sure you have seen how the drivers of big vehicles bully the smaller cars on purpose. No matter which lane the smaller car turns to, the big bully overtakes and follows closely. Beware road bully, inside that small car could be a 'chili padi' driver! If you get burned by one, don't cry for your mamma.

2. The Tailgaters
These type of drivers get their kicks from sniffing other people's asses. They love to follow other cars' asses very, very, very closely and will do so until they smash into one. And they do so at high speed too. These type of drivers are fools, endangering not only their lives but the lives of others too.

3. The Gawkers
These are the drivers who gawk at every single accident (to obtain the number plate of the crashed car in order to buy their 'lucky number' at the 4D shop). Here gawk, there gawk, everywhere gawk-gawk! And a lot of times, these gawkers are the ones who hold up traffic, causing massive traffic jams and also sadly, accidents.

4. The Illiterates
All of us who drive must have gone through some sort of compulsory class and training and exams right? Does this not mean that every driver has been taught the functions of the car gadgets and road signs? But nooooOOOOO!!! Drivers cannot understand the no u-turn sign, no-entry sign, no parking sign and cannot seem to fathom that they have to signal when they want to cut lanes, turn or stop.

5. Sir Honks-A-Lot
Honk! Honk! HONK!!!!!! It is like the honking is music to their ears. I honk you! You honk me! We all honk-honk each other. The more honks the merrier! We all honk together-gether!!

6. Miss-Brakes-A-Lot
Need I say more?

7. The Road Hoggers
These are the drivers that drive at snail-pace on the express lane. Exactly my point. They choose to drive the slowest they can at the fastest lane on the roads. Maybe they get the thrills that they are irritating every driver on the third lane or somewhere in their mind, the fastest lane is supposed to be the slowest. Or they can't tell the difference between fast and slow.

8. The Sleeping Beauties
It is truly amazing how these type of drivers can drive with their eyes closed! Amazing. They must be some kind of mutant that have eye-lids which are somehow transparent. I mean, I can't drive with my eyes closed you know.

9. The Multi-tasker
I think these drivers are A.M.A.Z.I.N.G! Can you imagine applying on mascara and eye shadow while driving on our 'evenly tarred road'? And how some drivers can be watching the DVD in the car while driving? Or SMS-ing while navigating through heavy traffic, or even while flying at break-neck speed? Wow! These people must have been born with an extra set of brains and eyes and hands too.

10. The F1 Drivers
These are the Michael Schumacher and Kimi Raikkonen wannabes and the road is theirs to weave in and out at their whim and fancy. For these wannabes, there are no rules, no regulations nor pit stops.

I am sure that almost all of us have met the 10 drivers stated above somewhere along in our driving lives. And I am sure that all of us have met people like these in our lives. The boss who bullies his people into submission. Or the doctor who bullies his patients into believing that there is no such thing as being 'allergic to chemicals'. The people who hold you up in life, irritate you with incessant 'honkings' as in endless whininess and complaining about how their life suck and drain out every single positive ion and atom out of you. The people who couldn't give a damn that their behavior or doings would affect your life and cause much trouble for you. And especially jerks who purposely slow you down so that they can cause you misery, stress and pain. And then gloat about it. Well, that will be another post for me to write on.

Coming soon: Life = Driving in KV (Part 3 - The Top 10 Stupidest Statements That Spew Out Of The Mouths of Drivers)




Life = Driving in KV (Part 1)


No comments:

Post a Comment